Monday, 3 November 2014

Film review: ABCs of Death 2 (2014)

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That said, this was surprisingly entertaining. To be honest, I already forgot a lot of it straight away because of how stupid it was, but the last three thingies were absolutely fucking amazing. Ridiculously over the top, messed up and hilarious while still managing to be creepy. Well, I mean, the "Zygote" thing. The "Youth" thing was just funny as fuck and had me laughing the whole time. I liked the "Vacation" one as well, and not only because of the sexy nudity and BLOOD GOES EVERYWHERE LIKE SPLASH SPLASH. But holy, dear fuck that last one. I... I just... like, I don't even... what... the... fuck.

Because of the last three and some of the others, I'll give this 65/100. If it was just those three, or the other stuff was as fucked up and awesome, I'd give it 99/100. But nope. It had a lot of boring stuff that ended just as it got interesting.

Saturday, 1 November 2014

New songs + horror art stuff + an announcement of some kind

Here are some new songs, at least some of which will be included on an album sometime in the future:

Larvae in the Trance Clone Unit

This one's all over the place and I'm really proud of how it turned out, especially the noisy ass parts and the part in the middle with the porn samples. I guess it could be called noise/trip hop/trance/techno/industrial/black metal/jazz/ambient if genre labels like that are necessary. The lyrics, in case anyone gives a shit, are pretty much gibberish with some words from Japanese, Finnish, Latin, Hungarian, Lithuanian and some other stuff.

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click


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Magical Reverse Cowgirl Scouts

I'd wanted to do a song called "Magical Reverse Cowgirl Scouts" for a long time and started working on it already like half a year ago, but for some reason didn't get it finished until now. Maybe it's because I wanted to make it live up to its name, and I'm not sure if it still does... I should add some cowbell. Might do that later today if I somehow manage to find the arse necessary to accomplish that. It's kinda funny how this started out as a hip hop track, but somewhere along the line it kinda went somewhere else. Oh, and it has the first proper guitar solo I've ever done in a song. Well, not necessarily "proper" since I recorded it in like six takes and sped it up, but meh... I do what I want and I wanted to do that because in the end it sounded how I wanted it to sound. Obviously.

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click


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Oxymoronic Florilegium: Heath Priviledger's Mindfuck Parade (the police are coming, hide the sausage!)

Not that anyone cares, but I actually recorded a lot more vocals and guitar stuff and everything and did a long ass synth solo for this song, but in the end I just couldn't be arsed to include all of that... in part because my computer would've exploded and in part because I'm a lazy assface.

Btw, the lyrics are supposed to be ridiculously stupid and parody a bunch of stuff but I'm not sure if all of it can be made out. Basically, I took a big steaming dump on everything and everyone I've been influenced by, or at least that was the intention.

And yes, I used the word "nigga" once. Problem? Because if that's what you focus on, seeing the world in black and white is probably on the top of your list of priorities...

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click



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The Cloven Visitor

I'm really proud of this one, and somehow miraculously it didn't fry my hard drive to shit; it uses about 1.2 GB of memory in FL Studio, which is way more than it can normally handle. If it isn't obvious, it's a song about uninvited ungulates. You know, like the Devil, homicidal unicorns and creepy ass deer and stuff. I meant to make it even longer, with a part starting from where it ends that has only vocals and then going into an epic crescendo finale that blows the shit out of everyone's minds, but sadly couldn't do that because my computer just couldn't handle it.

I feel like doing a "part 2" of this, but don't hold onto your headphones or speakers or whatever because I might not actually have the motivation.

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click


The Nurse Bleaches Mannequins

This one's really, really short because I suck at rapping and since it's a horrorcore track (or at least it's supposed to be one), that involves rapping. I realise that half of the reason why this sounds like total shit is that I added barely any effects on the vocals, not to mention that I forgot to breathe a lot so it's all gaspy and quiet and shit, but meh. I'm still pretty happy with it. The sample in the intro is from "The Rambler", which is one of the best horror films of all time.

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click


Romantic Dildo Exorcism

I realise that the drums in this one are way too quiet at some parts, but well. I'm too lazy to fix that, and besides, I don't think it sounds bad overall even if the mix is a bit weak-sounding. Some of the lyrics are in English, other parts are a mix of Latin, Japanese and Finnish that makes no sense at all. Also some total gibberish because that's fun.

Listen on Youtube: click
Free download: click


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And then, here's some art or whatever. Edited from whatever photos because fuck copyrights, and honestly, if someone cares then they're either an idiot who thinks way too highly of me (I mean, who's even gonna see these? Ten people?) or has a massive stick so far up their ass that they think the moon is made of cheese and cheese is made of human shit.

Click to enlarge, obviously.




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And now, an announcement of some kind. Like some of you probably know, I've been collaborating with the awesome chiptune person Onesimus Kain and we've already made one album together, "Lachrymose Mesoglea". But wait, there's more! We've already finished another one! It's pretty cool, and will also be downloadable for free sometime soon. It's probably a bit more "mainstream" than the first one, but still weird noise pop/ambient/whatever stuff.

Also, like I already mentioned, I'm kinda working on an album of some weird ass stuff myself. It's probably not even half-done yet (or it could already be finished, it's all down to how arsed I can get), but I have a release date set in mind that's a goal or whatever, but I'm not gonna say anything about that definitively because that'd only make me want to hurry and I don't want to hurry. So, just expect it in the first quarter of next year, mkay?