GOOD MORNING MANSON FAMILY!!!

I thought I'd do this, because in the TV show Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, the guy always yells "GOOD MORNING [name] FAMILY!!!", and well... you know, Manson family... so, I googled "good morning Manson family", found nothing, and... you know, I just had to.

I don't own any of the photos that were used, all are on the first pages on Google when searching "Charles Manson", "Charles Manson house", "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" and "open mouth", and I'm not trying to offend anyone by the way I used them, and it's only for entertainment/fun/whatever, and I don't get any money from using them and making this gif, etc. etc. etc. so don't sue me.

God pointed at me and said 'drop the bass'

...what? You think He pointed at me? No, no, He pointed at George W. Bush. And yeah, I just have to post this as a separate post and not just put it into the last one. Why? Because I think it's funny, and I'm selfish. So, without further ado,

Yep, I had to do that, just because... you know... I don't know, I'm amazed about how funny sampling Bush's centuries a few years old speeches in songs can be. Even if he hasn't been the president there for a while, and about when I started making music, that was pretty much when Obama got an erection elected. So, yes, in a way, it's super-lame to sample Bush's speeches, but I mean, he was a bit odd and funny, not really the kind of guy you'd expect to be a president, and that won't go away just because he's not in charge anymore. And in case you didn't know, this is the song, and I'm really satisfied with how it ended up being:
If only everything I did could be so epic... but for some reason, I only manage to make one or two good songs per album. Someday, I'll do a compilation of all the best songs I've done. Am I selfish today? Yes, oh yes, I'm so selfish that I'm typing like a homosexual closet sadomasochist. (No offence to homosexual closet sadomasochists intended).

And I think it'd finally be a good time to post this thing I did last year. Yeah, it's pretty much been exactly a year since I made it. Why did I never post it anywhere? Well, there's a good reason; I expected to use it somewhere, as an album cover or something... especially one certain album, but since that probably won't ever be made, it's pretty much useless to keep this hidden somewhere and just, you know, never put it online.

...if it's not obvious, it's some kind of man thingy. I don't know why he's like that, or what he is, but that doesn't matter. :P

Deformed Elephant Surgery - Neurovasculoferous Exoskeletal Teratomorphoitis (2012)

Yep, I just finished the new Deformed Elephant Surgery album. It's pretty much a sort of... well, a few new songs, a few remastered older ones, etc. and I'm not really proud of how it all fits together, but you know... it's better to have a shitload of stuff for a full-length than a few good songs for an EP. That's what I think, at least, when doing stuff. Anyway... so, yeah.

Track list:
01. Diabolical Corpse Predator (Apocalypse Edit)
02. Burning Bush Monkey
03. Mutated Space Dog Priapism
04. Lungfucked to Life
05. Celestial Alignment in Remembrance of the Monumental Disfiguration
06. The Helioambulist
07. Molest Like a Walrus
08. Chug Chug Wub Wub (Extended)
09. Phallus Mortis: Tribulation of the Headless Mortician
10. Sandalphon's Hieroincarnation Through Arterioparasitic Neurovascularization
11. Manmade Hypersexual Abomination
12. Diabolical Corpse Predator (Orchestral)
13. Mutation (Orchestral)

Download by clicking this tiny little text here. It's 320 kbps, obviously, if that's not obvious for everyone already.

You can listen a few songs on Youtube:
Burning Bush Monkey
Chug Chug Wub Wub (Extended)
Molest Like a Walrus

Molest like a walrus

Well, yeah, that's the name of a song I did... it's the gayest thing ever. :P The new Deformed Elephant Surgery album is gonna be gayer than the earlier ones, but also better. Gayness isn't a way to determine badness, obviously, when I say "it sounds gay" I mean it literally, it sounds like homosexuality. It's like 99% clean vocals and... well, listen it and you'll know. :P


Fixed kinda like semi-typos... or weirdness, mistakes, whatever they're called. The "someday" thing... o.O

CHUG CHUG WUB WUB + some sorta update thingy

I should probably have posted this here, since it seems like only very few people listen it otherwise... not that any more would if I post it here. Anyway, yeah, it's just an extended version of the song "Chug Chug Wub Wub", some remastering and stuff (mostly making it heavier/more brutal/whatever) and mostly re-recorded vocals with new lyrics that aren't as ridiculous and stupid.


Also, there's gonna be a new Deformed Elephant Surgery album as soon as I get enough inspiration to do a few more new songs; right now, I've done two that are completely new, one that was on the split with Skull Incision (you can download it here) and this one, a remastered version of "Diabolical Corpse Predator" and an orchestral version of "Mutation", which isn't necessarily finished yet... if I'd just manage to make it epic instead of calming, that'd be awesome but... you know, it's hard to do something epic from something that isn't epic without changing it too much to be considered the same thing. :P

But yeah, probably at least 3 more new songs and something, then it'll be done.

Potato energy

I made a new video (two, actually, but I updated the "My penis is 63 inches" post with the video of that) and it's about potatoes again. Well, one potato, but it's like about all potatoes.

Heave the Sun - Empyreal Obtenebration

Download: http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?jecoj7wc5bs3m5m
http://www.mediafire.com/?8oit90nu2fprsut

Track list:
01. Empyreal Obtenebration [X]
02. Feeding the Demiurge [X]
03. Otherworldly Reinvigoration [X]
04. March Across the Corpse Meadows [X]
05. Four-Dimensional Fractal Maze [X]
06. Living Shadows of Abraxas [X]
07. Venom of the Seraphim [X]

The whole album is 1 hour and 7 minutes long. (Click the things next to song names to listen on Youtube)

I'm really proud of the whole album, although some of the clean vocals could be better... but that's because I got a bit lazy and wanted to put this album for people to listen as soon as possible. That's the same thing that happens every goddamn time I make any album; the one night when I don't sleep and in the morning I'm fucking tired, then I decide "oh well it's finished, no one will notice that a few parts are hastily done" and then I regret it. Anyway, it's not like I'd regret already uploading this much, just that tiny bit about the vocals in a few of the tracks. But that's just a tiny little flaw which doesn't really bother me, so if it bothers anyone who listens, well, there's nothing you could do to fix it. :P But yeah, the clean vocals especially may need a bit getting used to if you're strictly a metalhead, since... well, you'll hear. I'm not gonna start explaining anything about my vocals or anything else in details, because I'm not that selfish... although like I said, I'm proud of the whole album; vocals included. Especially two of the songs ("Feeding the Demiurge" and "Venom of the Seraphim") are awesome in my own opinion. Sure, I could've made them better if I'd have spent more time mastering and stuff like that, but that's annoying and it's not meant to be perfectly clean; I don't want to be accused of overproductiveness or anything like that. Not that it'd be even near... but you know what I mean. Since there's a lot of non-metal stuff (especially in "Feeding the Demiurge"), it might be a bit disappointing to people who only like metal and are expecting something a lot heavier. If you're one of those people, well, this album isn't for you, although some of the songs are entirely death metal-rooted if that's an appropiate thing to say, since I started all of them as psychedelic ambient folk or whatever, and then just "expanded" them. Anyhow, you're probably not gonna like it, but if you do, go to "like" on Facebook, please.  It'd mean a lot to me to see if anyone actually enjoys this stuff.

If you're wondering about what language I'm singing: english. It's just that I can't pronounce for shit... so it sounds weird. :P Well, of course it's partially intentional, since the "style" of the vocals is what it is, which easily makes things hard to understand. But yeah, it's all in english.

My penis is 63 inches.

Well, I had already done an image of the same "subject" before, but it sucked and was completely retarded (I didn't post it in this blog at all). So anyway, while I was discussing batman-shaped penis tumors with some random guy, I thought about doing a new picture about this. He suggested making flyers of it, but I don't have a printer so that's just a tiny obstacle on the way to do that. Anyway, I did a kind of one-panel comic thingy or whatever you'd call it, and completely failed the guy's fist of manliness. For obligatory selfishness, I have to claim that the result is amazing.

It's a thumbnail, lick it!

And now I made a video of this.

Reversing questions

So, I was kinda half-trolling on Omegle (in the question thingy), asking people these things, and responses are pretty hilarious. I didn't save any logs, but the questions were stuff like this. Although not only these ones, and not exactly the same ones (at least not all, probably) but you know. Stuff like this.

Instead of asking "do you like sex?" (I know you're all perverts who like sex), I'll ask you: Does sex like you? •ᴗ•
 

Instead of asking "do you hate God?" (I know you're all atheists who hate God), I'll ask you: Does God hate you? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you know where Finland is?" (I know you're all stupid americans who don't know where Finland is), I'll ask you: Does Finland know where you are? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you play videogames?" (I know you're all nerds who play videogames), I'll ask you: Do videogames play you? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you masturbate to teletubbies?" (I know you're all weirdoes who masturbate to teletubbies), I'll ask you: Do teletubbies masturbate to you? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you hate dubstep?" (I know you're all close-minded haters who hate dubstep), I'll ask you: Does dubstep hate you? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you support racism?" (I know you're all racists who support racism), I'll ask you: Does racism support you? •ᴗ•

Instead of asking "do you know who George W Bush is?" (I know you all know who George W Bush is), I'll ask you: Does George W Bush know who you are? •ᴗ•

Jamppa, my pet cat who died

The new Deformed Elephant Surgery album, "Ubiquitous Astrolatric Oneirotheosis"

Well, so I finished doing the new album, and thought "Ubiquitous Astrolatric Oneirotheosis" was a fitting name for it, googled it, found nothing... and that's how it ended up being that. Anyway, I uploaded a few of the songs on Youtube:


And you probably want to download the whole album if you like those songs, and that's what this link is here for:

DOWNLOAD 
(along with "The Transdimensional Cataclysm")

I also did album art, which you already saw on those videos, but it won't hurt to put it here as well so you can see the whole thing in full size, although it's also included in the download, but well.

Deformed Elephant Surgery new album title... ugh.

Yeah, I'm not sure if it'll be "Astral Contiguity". I mean, it sounded retarded in the first place, and now that I've been doing more and more songs, it just doesn't seem really fitting at all. So, it's gonna be something else. I have no idea what yet... but well. :P

The sand was pulled

Apparently, now my name is Chuck Norris.

Easy guide on how to name yourself Chuck Norris!

1) Go to Google Translate.
2) Change the languages to english > chinese.
3) Put this there: "My name is not Chuck Norris."
4) Copy the result and put it from chinese > english.
5) Result is "My name is Chuck Norris."

Skinned alive and crucified? + Deformed Elephant Surgery update

For some reason, people being skinned alive is really disturbing. I mean, maybe it's because their skin gets cut off and it'd hurt like hell, or maybe it's because humans don't look nearly as normal without skin. Anyway, my point is that I googled "skinned alive and crucified" just to see if it's been used anywhere, and seems that that actually happened to some dude. Well, a bible dude, so it's pretty understandable, no one liked those guys back then, and as far as I know, they all were executed... pretty horrible. And no, I'm not saying that I like christianity, because I don't, but killing christians is wrong. It's killing people, and if you kill people, you're a shitty person. ...why did I start rambling about religion? My point was that some Bartholomew guy got skinned alive and crucified, or at least some people think that's how he died. I can't even imagine how much that'd hurt. Ouch...

ANYWAY, so I thought about it for a second and realized something. If that was a method for torture/execution over thousand years ago... that means people back then were more cruel than they're now. I mean, of course there are some people who are still big assholes and stuff. People torture each other in wars, etc. but not for doing whatever he did. I'm not sure what he did, but that's beside the point. He wasn't a criminal (I think?) and some people did that to him? Nowdays no one does that to anyone, even if they raped babies and ate them. Those kinds of people would deserve that, though... child molesters are seriously disgusting. But that's just my opinion.

...and I started rambling again. What I was trying to say was that if you look at the world now and into the history, you'll notice that it's not as bad as it used to be. Sure, there still are wars, there still are sick bastards, there still are pushy religious people, there still are bronies, there still are murderers... but still.

Now to my next point:

It's a pretty popular subject in stuff, people getting skinned alive, I think. The only things I can think of right now is a band named "Skinned Alive" and an episode of X Files, but you probably know thousands of other things. BLATANT SELF-PROMOTION TIME: I've made a song named "Skinned Alive and Fed to Priests". So, people apparently like others being skinned alive in fiction. I think it's cool too. It just is an interesting subject, both historically and for its shockiness, it's an easy way to make a "OH MY GOD THAT'S GOTTA HURT" thing. That leads to the conclusion that pineapples taste good but are hard to eat.

...

...huh? Oh, right. I wasn't talking about pineapples.

Also, a Deformed Elephant Surgery update thingy: there won't be any guest vocals by that one guy who I already announced would be doing guest vocals. Unless he somehow remembers/has enough time to record something... :< It's a very unlikely thing to happen now, since he's a really busy person, which is why I understand perfectly. Also, the new album is almost finished, I think. I'm not sure if I'll do one or two more songs (I'd like to, but I have a feeling no one has enough patience to wait a few more weeks...). So I'm probably gonna just do a few changes to the mostly finished songs and then upload it to Mediafire. I've done a few potential candidates for album art, tell me what's the best (if anyone ever even sees this...). They're all thumbnails, so click them to see bigger...

...myself, I think the first one is probably the best, but I'm not sure. Anyway, um... the album title is "Astral Contiguity", like you 99% likely already noticed. Yeah, I know, it's pretty lame, but whatever. I like stuff that's somehow related to things like that. Lyrics aren't as much like that than on the last two albums, though... erm, I'll get a lot of shit down my neck for some song titles, I'm pretty sure of that. :P But hey, I'm used to that, even though it still hurts when people take everything too seriously and think like "oh, so you have like a garden gnome fetish"... luckily no one has ever thought that way, at least not enough to complain about it to me. I don't have a garden gnome fetish, or anything else like that. There aren't as many clean vocals, by the way. So if you didn't like my retarded emo-sounding faggot whining, you might like the new album more. Juuuuuuuuuust kidding, there's more of that than ever before. \(ᴼᴗᴼ)/

I just uploaded one finished song that's gonna be on the new album, please listen: